There is something that I’ve followed for most of my life but have never been able to perfectly put into words. While watching an interview with Nene from my guilty pleasure of a TV show The Real Housewives of Atlanta, she said, “Let your haters be your motivators.” This mantra is a way to remind people to take control of their lives.
What is a hater? A hater is any person in your life that has anything negative to say about your life. In reality, they’re too scared of doing what it takes and so they’re there to try to bring you down. However, if you want your dreams enough and are willing to do whatever it takes, then don’t let anyone take those opportunities away.
We all know how it goes. You see a sexy looking Shakira on the cover of Latina and the only thing that you can say is “I hate that bitch” even though you own all of her CDs and would flip out if you could ever meet her. That’s right. Even you can be a hater.
I learned these lessons early. When I was little, all that I wanted was to be a singer. I would sing along to my Selena cassettes and practice dancing in the mirror. Then, once in the second grade, everyone had to take turns singing the national anthem. My teacher ended up flat out telling me that I couldn’t sing and needed to take voice lessons. I was a little kid so I figured that she knew what she was talking about so I stopped singing. Right then, I allowed her to tell me what I couldn’t do. By listening to her, I let her take away my dream. I let her take control.
By the time that I entered the eighth grade, I was tired of missing out on something that brought me so much joy, so I entered a talent show. It was then that I discovered that she was the only person that thought I couldn’t sing. Later on, in high school, I joined the drama club and sang lead in some musicals. I even entered more talent shows. Eventually, I even had some singing gigs. Singing is the only thing that I love more than writing. If I had continued to let that hater of a music teacher stop me from singing, then I would’ve ended up just as miserable as her. Before I do anything important, I think of her and it makes me want to keep proving her wrong.
When you come across someone that says that you can’t do it, ignore them. Use others’ negativity as your fuel and show them that you are indeed strong enough. You have to be brave enough to live your life and know that when something “good or bad” happens, it should be on your terms. You took a risk and learned from it.
Author: Crissy Zamarron
Like you mentioned, this is a great philosophy to empower yourself with. For some strange reason people rather spend all their energy cutting down others chasing after happiness instead of pursuing their own. It never has and never will make sense to me when people act that way.
Thanks for sharing this!
I’m so glad you wrote about this. Because this is the exact thing I am going through right now. People try and really, really try to just bring you down..because they are too damn scared to even stick their pinky toe in the water to see how it feels. I want to hug you right now for sticking it out and jumping in all the way!!!!! You are amazing Crissy.
<3 Jeanette
Great article, Crissy! You’re quite a talented writer and I am really enjoying your work so far.
Man, there is a lot of hate out there! I agree with your article. Most people don’t want to see you succeed and will say everything they can to keep you where you are because if you make it and they don’t then that will speak poorly about them.
What I’ve learned recently is that you need to separate yourself from these people because you become who you hang around with and what your brain is fed: garbage in, garbage out!
We cannot let these negative people tells us that we can’t achieve whatever our goal is. What have THEY accomplished in life?
Dream big to achieve great things! Winners just do it.
Thank you all for your comments, I really do appreciate the support.
We who have the will to make it need to stick together!
First let me say I am not the same Jeanette Lawrence who posted earlier. I only found this post because someone googled my name and told me about this. Wow! Two of us out there with the same spelling and everything. Anyway, I love what you wrote and am going to print it to remind me daily. Thanks Crissy!
I went through close to the same thing when I was in highschool. My school counselor told me that I didn’t have what it took for college and I should focus on a trade school. Well that was a BS, a MS, a MeD and most of my PhD ago and I know now that he did not have a clue as to what I was capable of. Never lose sight of your dream or what you know you can do. Thanks for posting this.