Does being a Mom mean that I should be exhausted every hour of every day? As I sat, during my class, for four hours the other night and struggling to write a research paper for my psychology class, I had a revelation. “Being a Mom is hard work!†I could barely keep my eyes open, as my son hung onto my back and screamed in my ear. He desperately wanted Mommy’s attention and didn’t feel it was fair that I had to do homework instead of watching a cartoon with him. “I hate your school, Mommy!†Those words produced a lump in my throat and a guilty tear in my eye. I wondered to myself why I was doing all of this.
I often struggle with my life choices. Should I have returned to work after only two and a half years as Niko’s mommy? Will my teenage daughter resent the time that I spend away from home? Was returning to college a good idea? I have so much to do at home and juggling school and work can be really tiring.
Believe it or not, I am very greedy regarding time with my children. Days off are dedicated to family. No job or work could ever replace my kids and, although I spend lots of quality time with them, I often wonder if it is enough. Will it ever be enough? Sometimes I feel like there just isn’t enough of me to go around.
As mothers, we struggle to find balance. I realize that hard work and dedication are great examples for my children. My daughter once told me, “I’m so proud of you, Mom!†Those kinds of words keep me going. They keep me working hard toward my dream of getting a degree. I realize that I’m not only a mother. I’m also a woman with dreams, goals and ambitions. One day, my children will be all grown up and pursuing their own dreams and where will I be? I’ll be their biggest cheerleader.
So, what does it all mean? It means that, as mothers, we set examples for our children. We show them the importance of hard work, dedication, and service. We teach them that no matter how old we are, how many kids we have or where we come from, we can achieve our dreams. There is no job more important than being a mother. I am living my dream.
“Without ambition one starts nothing. Without work one finishes nothing. The prize will not be sent to you. You have to win it.” ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson).
Author: Rhonda Gutierrez
Graphics by: Paula Anderanin
Great article, Rhonda. This is the reality of most families in this country and nobody should ever have to make these kind of choices to consider putting their kids second to their jobs or school. My own personal story: my dad has always worked for the government, both state and federal. Unfortunately, working for the Mexican federal government means that you will relocate every few years, so this meant that my parents had to make the difficult decision of leaving my sister and I with my mother while my father “found stability” and hoped for the best that one day they would relocate him back home. Well, seventeen years later my father is still working away from his home, from his wife, sacrificing A LOT, missing graduations, and precious moments. Don’t get me wrong. My father is my hero and I will forever be grateful to what he did for us, but it enfuriates me that his had work and dedication has not paid off for HIM.
I know this is a bit extreme and this will not happen for most families, but little by little families are growing apart, just so that they can make it, pay the bills. This is non-sense and it fuels my motivation to NEVER have to make these kind of decisions for my family, building our own business so that my kids never have to work for another name and have the freedom of choice to be who they want to be.
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Great article!
I was just talking about this the other day. About how not only do we put too much on ourselves but also a lot is expected of us as well! Good job Rhonda.
What a great writer you are Rhonda! I loved this article.